Monday, 10 November 2008

• Currently Listening If I Were a Boy see related

  Hello everyone!
        It has been awhile again.  I only seem to remember to blog when something happens.  Bad huh?  It was nice to hear old friend comments on my other stuff.  I will TRY my best to keep up..heheh
        So my topic for today is: "Happily married and dreaming of divorce."
        So I heard this article on my fave radio show (will have to figure out what mag wrote it).  I would love to read about it.  I heard many comments about it and of course there is always 2 side to the story.  I heard from friends that they do not want to marry because they feel it would change them.  Marriage is all about compromise and if you are not ready to do so, then yes, you will have to change yourself and it would not make you happy.  With anything, to make yourself get along with people, you have to compromise.  If you are unwilling to do so, then you cannot live with anyone, right? 
         In this article, the woman who wrote said she is "steadily" happy with her husband, but some quirks of his bothered her.  The longer she lived with him, the unhappier she became with his quirks.  She notice it happened to all women mid way through their marriage in which she called "mid wife" (and not the kind of nurse that helps with birth ).  She feels after 15 years of marriage, people get bored and then afraid to divorce and so become unhappy but can't leave, especially when children are involved.  It seems most women encounter this when they seem to have a plan with their life.  They feel they need to get married to be happy and have children and follow society, so when their plan falls through, they are unhappy.  They feel the pressures, so they choose someone for the wrong reasons, as some would call "settling," even though settling is not a bad thing as my friend and I discussed.  It may not be the best choice and so the compromise too much and once the woman realizes this, becomes unhappy.  Yes, nothing is wrong in the marriage, but yet she is still "dreaming of divorce."  It is kind of choosing the lesser of 2 evils.  If you think about, divorce is a lot of work as well.  I mean marriage is a lot of work.  You have to constantly change with each other.  Grow and adopt.  If you cannot do that, then yes, you will be unhappy. 
         Some will say why marry then because being single will be less work.  That is true.  It really depends if you want to be alone for the rest of your life.  My fave quote from a movie was, "A partner is your witness in life."  You feel you lived when someone has seen it with you.  Nobody can do that but your spouse (well, you can argue if you live with someone, they can do it too).  It just is a different feeling.  You go through ups and downs and it feels so good to come out of those downs   So marriage is not for everyone.  It really depends on the person and marriage is not for the "faint at heart."  Being married for only a short time does not make me an expert, but i can tell you it is not easy, but in the end I am happy.  There are unhappy moments like today, but we get through it.  Who doesn't fight/argue?  We fight with our family and friends but once you make up, that is when you know they mean something to you.  Only the ones you love you can keep trucking through the good and the bad times.
        I do have to say, I was so mad today, I really liked this song:
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  Artist: Beyonce Knowles Album: Unknown Title: If I Were a Boy

  
  [Verse]
  If I were a boy
  Even just for a day
  I’d roll outta bed in the morning
  And throw on what I wanted then go
  Drink beer with the guys
  And chase after girls
  I’d kick it with who I wanted
  And I’d never get confronted for it.
  Cause they’d stick up for me.
  
  [Chorus]
  If I were a boy
  I think I could understand
  How it feels to love a girl
  I swear I’d be a better man.
  I’d listen to her
  Cause I know how it hurts
  When you lose the one you wanted
  Cause he’s taken you for granted
  And everything you had got destroyed
  
  [Verse]
  If I were a boy
  I would turn off my phone
  Tell everyone it’s broken
  So they’d think that I was sleepin’ alone
  I’d put myself first
  And make the rules as I go
  Cause I know that she’d be faithful
  Waitin’ for me to come home (to come home)
  
  [Chorus]
  If I were a boy
  I think I could understand
  How it feels to love a girl
  I swear I’d be a better man.
  I’d listen to her
  Cause I know how it hurts
  When you lose the one you wanted (wanted)
  Cause he’s taken you for granted (granted)
  And everything you had got destroyed
  
  [Bridge]
  It’s a little too late for you to come back
  Say its just a mistake
  Think I’d forgive you like that
  If you thought I would wait for you
  You thought wrong
  
  [Chorus 2]
  But you’re just a boy
  You don’t understand
  Yeah you don’t understand
  How it feels to love a girl someday
  You wish you were a better man
  You don’t listen to her
  You don’t care how it hurts
  Until you lose the one you wanted
  Cause you’ve taken her for granted
  And everything you have got destroyed
  But you’re just a boy

  
         If only boys knew how women feel, then there would be no arguments   Guys are just so insensitive sometimes that it can get annoying.  But there will always be "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus."  We cannot always figure each other out, but we can try to understand and just go with it right?  I just don't like being taken for granted.  That is all I have to say....good night...until next time
  
  

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